I could handle being a loner if i didnt go to school. Well sortof. I mean if i was homeschooled i wouldnt really care.
so anyway badthings on being a loner.well you go to school, and theres not much point going cos nowadays you dont learn
anything, well not in britan anyway. so you go there and you go to lessons and everyone is just like being bad and you wish
you could be bad but you cant cos you got no-one to be bad with. and then everyone calls you a neek cos your not being bad.
so anyway then its break and your praying that the class will be kept in by the teacher but they aint. so you go to break
and you would mind just sitting down somewere and wait for it to end but then again you cant cos then everyone would thing
your a loner even though they already do but like you dont want to make it worse. so you walk slowy up to the toilet
pretendin ur going toilet go out of toilet slowy go to the water founttaion slowly take a drink. you would take it slowly
but the next person in line would just beat you up. so then after that your stuck for things to do. so what do you do? you
could go to the toilet again but the same people in there would start to think you have bladder problems and you could get
picked on for that. you could go to reception to get a new timetable cos u "lost it" you could walk around the school ten
times wich is alrite for me but then people would start to think your a loner and a bit of a weirdo. and then its next lesson
so you already start going there as soon as the bell goes and you get up there and no-ones there so you wait for ages (lookin
like a loner and a neek). so yeah. and then its lunch time and you re-live the situation again. and so thats what its like
everyday. great init?
so you get back from school go on the internet and you think its going to be great cos ur going to talk to ur only friends.
but it gets worse. you have to sit listenting to them talking about there friends. what fun they get up to and all that malachi.
and you just sit there going green with envy. then you look at ther profile and its all about ther frends and grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
and you can go on msn.com and look at the recent contact cards, and again its all about ther frends pictures of ther frends
messin about and grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr it makes me bare sad and o how i wish i was them. loads of people take ther friends
for granted. but when you get to be in a loners position you will soon see. crying yourself to sleep, self-harming, low self-esteem,
comfort eating the side effects will soon kick in.
and then its the holidays. great! but you will soon see its great, but its not that great. you can go shopping but you'll
soon see friends. oooo is that green blusher im wearing? you can go to the cinemar. friends. you can go park. friends. anyway
on holiday anywere! and its so borin as well you wish you had friends to go places with. and its even worse for me cos my
birthdays in the holiday. but its just like a normal boring day cos you gotta spend it with your family and you cant
go anywere for ur birthday cos you've got no-one to invite. im even crying wen im typing this.
and then its school again. great and you live the nightmare once again.
you may think it dosnt sound that bad. but when your living it, you dont want to know.
